Shut the Front Door....

...Here comes #4!

I'm pregnant with baby #4!

Oh this little one is already so loved. It's been a longer journey getting this one here than we are accustomed to. We had hoped to get pregnant around the first of the year and assumed it would happen right away. It didn't. A few months later (and feeling a little frustrated) we were so happy to finally get a positive test.

That happiness only lasted a few weeks. We were so sad to find out that we'd lost that baby. I was a little surprised at how devastating that loss was. I cried a lot, for weeks and weeks. We loved that baby and were so excited for him/her to join our family. I felt like it was a boy, and I missed him. We had some wonderful friends who brought us dinner and flowers and gifts and felt some comfort, but still I felt quite broken hearted for awhile. It took longer than expected to resolve the miscarriage, which was also discouraging. Finally two months later we had everything taken care of and got the all clear to try again whenever we'd like.

And my heart felt conflicted. We were now into June. After such a hard, emotional Spring I really wanted to just enjoy a fun summer with my boys, free of nausea. Also, I didn't want another winter baby (like all three others). We ended up deciding we'd just put it in the Lord's hands. If it happened great. If not, that was fine too.

So of course, 2 weeks later I was staring at a positive pregnancy test, completely shocked. I waited a whole day to tell Ben, since the next day was our anniversary. I wrapped up the test and gave it to him on our date. Happy tears filled his eyes and he couldn't believe it. It was kind of surprising to us, both also such a healing, happy moment!

We took a blood test at 8 weeks into the pregnancy to find out the gender of the baby and were shocked to learn a few days later that it's a GIRL! I was definitely expecting a boy, but I'm thrilled with this fun surprise! Ben is pretty apprehensive about what we will do with a little girl- I'm sure we'll manage just fine!

We are so thankful for this baby. My heart has healed so much. I've been so sick and thrown up more times than I can count.  But we are so happy to welcome HER to our home in 2020!

Our New Routine

School is in full swing and we are getting used to our new normal. It is such a drastic change from our summer routine and while it feels good, we've all had some adjusting to do! Our mornings start at 6:30 when Chase begins his piano practice, I'm back to a solid hour in the kitchen every morning (making breakfast, feeding everyone, cleaning everything up, making lunches), and hustling kids all morning to get their jobs done and get them both out the door with hair done, brushed teeth and backpacks fully packed. It's a wild couple of hours, but altogether not that crazy. The boys are getting into a really good place with their jobs and being really responsible, we usually get a little of their homework in the morning too.

Once the boys peddle away, Davis and I go to the gym. Then we come home and we have all morning together! I'm loving it! We have time to play with little friends, go on walks, do puzzles, read books together and on this particular day, we made cookies. I've never made cookies with just Davis before and it was so fun! He was so cute helping with all the ingredients, and he was super excited to be wearing the little tractor apron that used to be his brothers. Also, the cookies turned out delicious.

 I sent this series of pictures to Ben when he was out of town and he said he literally laughed out loud when he saw them. This boy just really goes for it. He doesn't really even cry when he falls. He's a tough boy!

 This cracked me up one particular morning- his commitment to drinking his milk and riding his bike were both strong.

 I know, there are so many pictures of Davis in this post. I have no excuses. He's just darling. He usually insists that Ben put him to bed at night and I snapped this picture of them reading books together on this particular night.

 We had our final swim night at Nana and Papa's! It was a blast! The kids had a great time in the pool and then we had a delicious BBQ and finished the night with smores. This is such a fun tradition we love all summer long. I also love the relationship my boys are forming with their cute little cousins.

 One day I had errands to run at Farmington Station and we bought soap. He insisted on carrying the bag all the way back to the car. It took forever. And it was darling.

 I volunteer in Chase's class every Friday for an hour and this year I'm being brave and taking Davis with me. He's super psyched since he tries to "go to school" with the big kids most mornings. He was also super excited that I packed him his own little backpack of toys to hopefully keep him occupied. At some point in the morning I end up handing him my phone and we somehow make it through.

 Aunt Heidi came to visit! We had such a blast with her while she was here! One day she took the boys to twisted sugar after school and this is all of them eating their spoils here at home. They adore her. Somehow I didn't get more pictures of her visit, but Davis and I got to hang with her almost every day and we had a great time. Heidi even roped me into helping her paint our new niece's nursery and we ended up having a lot of laughs doing it.

 She brought Hudson two new bulls to add to his collection. He immediately called a meeting of trough club. Heidi overheard him saying "Okay guys, horns in."

 My little bike riders! These boys ride their bikes to and from school every day and it's been awesome! They usually go in a little bike gang of 6 kids and they've been doing great. I love that it's good for them, they get more exercise and fresh air, and I don't have to drive as much. Win-win!

After they get home from school our life feels really crazy for the next few hours. We have to get right on homework, the boys really want some time to play, and then it's a rush to make dinner, feed everyone, baths and get everyone to bed. It's a busy life these days, but I love it!